7 ways to develop your kid’s character
As much as it pains us to see our child cry, learning to say no to their demands is key to teaching resilience. It can also be an opportunity to teach them self-control and obedience.
It starts in their formative years. Building resilience in children gives them the ability to excel, or sometimes just cope, with life. Resilience is a powerful gift that you can give your child.
While allowing kids to enjoy their childhood, parents must keep in mind that keeping their world completely “problem free” might not be good for their character development. Building resilience in children will help them face life in the future with courage and strength.
Here’s how you too can nurture a resilient child.
1. Learn to Say No
Many parents avoid saying no to their child to save them from disappointment. But mums, as much as it pains you to see your child cry, learning to say no can have positive benefits – especially when it comes to building resilience.
For example, crying over a toy is not a signal that you should give it to them. Remember, it can also be an opportunity to teach your child self-control and obedience. It’s also an early lesson that sometimes, you can’t get everything you want – a simple truth that you don’t have to hide from your children.
2. Create an Independent Mind
Mums, develop your child’s self-reliance at an early age. This is not to say that you should leave your child to fend for himself. Guide him, but let him discover things on his own too, knowing that you are there should he need you.
It is important to note that independence doesn’t mean teaching children to rely only on themselves. According to experts in child psychology, relationships and trust are also important in developing a child’s resilience. Knowing that people are there to support you is an important pillar in life.
3. Teach Them to Be Proactive
As early as now, it’s important that children know the power of being proactive – yes, they have the ability to help themselves and help others!
According to the Counselling Resource, goal-setting is one way to develop proactivity. Based on the goal, help him come up with steps he needs to do in order to achieve the goal. This builds the concept that goals just don’t happen, steps needed to be taken in order for goals to be achieved.
4. Positivity Is Key
Young children are naturally full of sunshine and goodness. Reinforce these qualities in your child.
Guide your child to look at himself and the world positively. A positive point of view will help him to be more resilient later on in life.
PBS Parents tells us that celebrating even a child’s small victories will train him to focus on what he is doing right in order to achieve his goal. Empathising with your child is also another way, because it shows him that you understand what he is going through.
So for instance, if he is having a hard time in something, an encouraging thing to say could be, “Yes it is challenging, but look how far you’ve come!”
One way to learn this lesson can be as simple as realising that a failed exam doesn’t equate to failure. There’s always a chance to be better and help others be better.
According to the American Psychological Association, praising a child for a step forward towards a goal makes them focus on what they have achieved rather than what they haven’t.
5. Encourage Problem-Solving
Problem-solving is a skill that not only trains the mind to think, but introduces the concept that problems or hurdles can be worked on, or solved. Engaging children in puzzles is one way to build problem-solving skills. And that’s not all. Other positive traits are also developed through puzzles, such as cognitive and fine motor skills.
6. Explain, Don’t Impose
Often times, children understand more about the world than we give them credit for. Explain why and how things are done instead of simply imposing rules.
So instead of telling your little one that he has to sleep by 9pm, patiently tell him how it will help him grow up to become a strong boy. You might be surprised to find him sleeping all on his own come bedtime!
Also read: 7 ways to enjoy bedtime reading with kids