Female masturbation is often seen as a taboo subject. So even though many women want to know how to masturbate, it stays a secret. You’ve probably tucked yourself into a corner to read this article, for fear of odd looks from passers-by. To be honest, you may want to look over your shoulder often if you're reading this at the office. You don't want your boss to know what you'll be doing after work.
To help us shake off the persistent social stigma, we’ve created a guide to female self-pleasuring. We spoke to women about their own experiences of masturbation. We've also got some expert tips on how to make stronger orgasms. The only thing to do now is read on, and plan an early night.
Get to know your nether regions
Understanding the different bits of your body is the first step towards successful masturbation. Don’t be put off by the fact that you may not know all the names of your parts. The first and most important step is getting to know how to ‘use’ them. Getting to know your body, and not getting hung up on terminology, is the best approach.
Here are some simple, straightforward definitions for some of your bodily bits:
Vulva: This is the outer part of your lady landscape. It includes the clitoris, labia lips, urethra and entrance to the vagina, and its opening is almond shaped.
Clitoris: When people people talk about the clitoris, they’re usually just talking about the glans – the very sensitive outside part. But the bean-like bump you can see on the vulva is just the tip of the iceberg. It's the only organ of the body with the sole function of providing pleasure.
Vagina: "This is a pulsing muscle that opens and closes between the cervix (at the base of the uterus) and the external opening."
Getting to know your menstrual cycle may be an important way of getting stronger orgasms from the experience. You may not feel the urge to masturbate during your pre-menstrual cycle. But the orgasms will actually be way better, even if they do take a bit longer. Using the tips of your fingers, lightly tap the public bone above the clitoris to wake the vulva up. You may also want to press down and rub in a circular motion.
Introducing your clitoris
Your clitoris is awesome. The clitoris is more than just the outer, bean-shaped part. It's the most nerve-rich part of the vulva, containing over 8,000 nerve endings. This is twice as many nerves as the penis. This makes it the powerhouse of pleasure.
There’s more to the clitoris than initially meets the eye. This tiny erogenous zone spreads the feel-good-love to 15,000 other nerves in the pelvis. It explains why it feels like your whole body is being taken over when you orgasm.
Making sure the tip of your finger is nice and moist, slowly pull the hood over the clitoris back and gently stroke the head of the clitoris. You may also want to use a small circular motion, depending on your preferences.
Use your hands
Though sex toys can be a good way to introduce your body to the self-pleasure game, it's best to avoid becoming dependent on them. The real fun and pleasure comes through when you use your fingers. You want to be able to touch yourself, so that you can be playful and get to know the speed and feel you want.
Making a peace sign with your hands, place each finger on either side of the outer labia. Then, while pressing down lightly, wiggle the fingers towards each other, squeezing and lifting the labia together between the two fingers.
Don’t just think about orgasm
There’s more to masturbation than the big O. It's important to enjoy the whole experience, rather than racing to the finish line. Lube can be particularly good for assisting in the arousal process. Engaging in foreplay can be beneficial for your relationships too. Be as indulgent as possible. Give yourself the full experience by making time to be exploratory and playful. By doing so, you’ll build a better relationship with your own body. As a result, you'll be able to have more confidence in a relationship to say exactly what you want and when.
Starting at the base of the vagina, lightly drag your fingertip at a snail’s pace towards the clitoris. Make sure you don’t put your finger in too deep at this point, as you want to avoid touching the urethra.
Resource: BBC
Also read: Kylie Jenner’s Take On Motherhood And Sexuality
