According To A Psychotherapist, Your Daughter Could Be The Next Bill Gates

According To A Psychotherapist, Your Daughter Could Be The Next Bill Gates

Though we often wish to raise our girls to be confident, we might also be doing things that unconsciously force them to remain small.

Girls have always been raised different from boys. They are taught to look after the home, not encouraged to pursue careers or do the things that boys do. Thus you have girls who don't believe in themselves or don't see much in the future. But what if you could raise your daughter to be the next Bill Gates. Would you give it a shot?

How to raise your daughter to be the next Bill Gates

how we raise girls differ

According to psychotherapist Amy Morin, the difference in the ways parents raise boys and girls determines how each gender will turn out and the choices they make. In a report published in Behavioral Neuroscience, experts found some evidence to support the difference in the language parents use for little boys and girls. Parents use moderate language like  "much" and "better" for girls. And they use stronger language like "win" and "top" for boys.

These might seem like little things, but they give little girls the idea that there are certain lines they shouldn't cross, certain rooms they shouldn't try to enter.  Amy Morin suggests some ways to raise your little girl to be mentally strong:

  • Teach her to calculate risk

Stories of people who went in really big and failed can be used to teach her how to take calculated risks. People like that have the mentality that diving into a risky situation on both feet is how winners win. But that's not always the case. Teach your daughter that the fear she feels isn't a measure of how big the risk is.

black girls need mentorship

  • Surround her with people who challenge and inspire her

Influences are very important in self-growth because they present a picture of who you can become. Remember the saying, "Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are." Hence, the people you surround your daughter with can influence how she turns out. Surround her with capable and inspiring people. Gates himself had wanted to be a math teacher until a friend of his challenged him to go into programming. For your daughter, it could be a best friend who puts her straight when she's playing small or a music teacher who shows her the hidden potential she has.

  • Encourage her to break rules

This is like making her a rebel with a good cause. People who stick by the rules hardly make space for themselves because they're always trying to do it the way everyone did it. Rule breakers make space for themselves by carving out a new path. "I was a bit disruptive," Gates said in an interview with the BBC. "I started early on sort of questioning were their rules logical and always to be followed, so there was kind of a bit of tension there as I was kind of pushing back." So, teach your daughter that some rules are meant to be broken.

encourage her to break rules

  • Encourage her to learn math and science

There's an existing idea in this side of the world that math is completely useless later in life. Math makes you a problem solver, giving you the ability to think quickly. Encourage your daughter to learn math by surrounding her with puzzles, books and games that can get her interested in the subject. Tell her that she can learn math and science without pursuing them professionally.

Generally, outside the four points above, try to encourage your daughter with the same language with which you do your son. Avoid discouraging your daughter from doing anything on the basis of gender.

Read also: 13 Surprising ways to empower your daughter and boost her confidence!

CNBC

Written by

Lydia Ume