Dear husband,
First I would like to thank you for the love and happiness you bring to our family. The children and I are very blessed to have you and we know it. So, thank you.
But, remember when our second daughter said her first word? We were in the living room, watching a movie you picked. Only, you weren't watching because your attention was on whatever was making you smile at your phone. That's why when she said "dada", you didn't hear it. This is something you always do, by the way. You insist on a movie, and then you pick up your phone. Two hours later, the movie is over and with it the opportunity to bond as a family.
I get it. Please know I understand that your phone is your networking tool and sometimes it's work. I also know your phone helps you unwind after a particularly long day. I’m also guilty of preferring my Instagram feed to playing peekaboo with our son for the 57th time in a row. I get the distraction it causes. But here’s what I don’t think you realize: You’re missing out. You're missing out on precious family memories of your children that you can never get back.
I hate that we're in church, the sermon is on, and you reach into your pocket for your phone because " a client might send a text." In church? What are you teaching the kids? Parenting is leadership by example, and these ones are only too ready to mirror all the things they see us do.
It was annoying when it was just us two. I found it annoying to constantly have to repeat your name because you didn’t hear me the first time. It was embarrassing when we were out with my family and you were the only one sitting on your phone while everyone else was talking.
When it was just the us, I felt like you were only half here with me. I was talking and you were only giving me some of your attention while the rest was catching up on BlackBerry Messenger. In fact, it’s hard to remember back when smartphones weren’t a thing yet and you used to go hours without a phone in your hand.
Now, we're a family, blessed with beautiful children. These small, seemingly insignificant moments that pass you by as your thumb is scrolling? They are priceless treasures. I don’t want you to look back and realize how much you didn’t see because you were looking down at your phone
Dear husband, I love you but your addiction to your phone is hurting us. It’s affecting our marriage and the relationship we have with our child. Please think about the message you’re sending to your daughter and your wife. You may not realize the power you have to make or break us.
Please, I’m begging you, put your phone down sometimes. Be more present with us. Look us in the eyes while your phone is in the next room. I promise you won’t regret it.
Love,
Your wife.
Also read: I See You: Open Letter To The Single Parent
