Is the way to a man’s heart through his stomach or not?

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Back in the day, parents would make sure their daughters knew how to cook. The reason wasn’t that these girls needed to know how to feed themselves. It was much more complicated. The common belief was that the way to a man’s heart was through his stomach, and as such, a woman was supposed to be a magician in the kitchen. That was the only way to hold a man, or so they said.

the way to a man's heart

Good food is a bonus when you’re with the right person

Is the way to a man’s heart through his stomach?

People all over the world love good food, but being able to ‘throw down’ in the kitchen is no guarantee that a man will love you. A woman once told her daughter she needed to not only know how to cook but also know how to out-cook any other woman in the man’s life. Out-cooking the competition was that woman’s strategy. “If your cooking is top-notch, a man will always choose you above a mediocre cook,” she said.

Her daughter went on to learn how to cook Afang soup, Efo Riro, Jollof rice and some very hard-to-prepare meals from other parts of Nigeria. Even with her advanced kitchen skills, her man chose someone else, proving to her that the saying, “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach,” is nothing but a myth.

If cooking isn’t enough, how then do you warm your way into his heart?

An old lady once cheekily said that the way to a man’s heart isn’t through his stomach. Her advice was that women who wanted to keep a man should aim a few inches lower and try to get him below his belt. The wink that followed her advice suggested that she really didn’t believe a man would stay because of sex.

The way to a man's heart

Cooking is a survival skill, and everyone should know how to cook

Why should you discard the suggestion that cooking can hook a man?

1. Good food is everywhere

Cooking is a survival skill, and there’s a good chance that your man is already a good cook himself. Male chefs dominate the food industry. Even if he isn’t, he can get access to all kinds of affordable, delicious food. If you visit bukas, you will see that a great number of customers are men, most of them married men who just prefer Iya Segun’s efo riro even though their wives back home can cook the meal excellently.

2. Good food won’t make up for toxic behavior

Of what use is the saying that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach when he has to come home to nagging and warfare? Instead of learning all the recipes from Lagos to Timbuktu, why not work on becoming the kind of person anyone would want to come home to? The first step is to unlearn all toxic behaviours and work on your character.

3. Excellent cooking isn’t that important when it isn’t just meant to be

No matter how delicious your ekpang nkukwo, a relationship that isn’t working will remain comatose no matter your kitchen expertise. You sumptuous meals will probably get you a man who enjoys great home-cooked meals. But it most definitely won’t get him to fall in love. You’ll be disappointed to learn this fact if you have always believed that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.

Cooking is a survival skill, and everyone—both men and women—should know how to feed themselves. Expecting someone to fall in love with you because of food will only lead to disappointment. When you meet the right person, good food will be a bonus!

Also Read: Ofada rice recipe

Written by

Julie Adeboye